Trolling the chess tables

Back in the wild-west days of the internet anonymity reigned supreme.  Early websites didn’t even ask for your name, they just wanted a “screen name” practically inviting you to make something up.  I was “Shaddicus_Nimbus” or ”ThePlatypus.”  When websites started asking you to register your zipcode I think all my friends started putting in 90210 without even consulting each other.  After all it isn’t yahoo’s business where we live.

I remember playing chess on some boardgame website that later got eaten by yahoo games.  This was about 1994, and I was in the computer lounge at University of Memphis.  Each game had a chat room.  Typically it was just the 2 of you, but people could watch the games and and ask to play the winner or whatever.  Whoever set up the table had the power to boot watchers from the room, but is seldom came up.  I used the chat box to tell people they made nice moves as well as to explain to them that my power was beyond their understanding. This is where I first saw “lol” and in the same conversation “lmao.”

you know you need it

click to go to training on knight forks

 For the none of you interested in this ground breaking event I’ll recount for you the quip.  He forked my Queen and my Rook with his knight and I said “OW!  My Anus!”  After that night I had a napkin with all these unknown abbreviations that I took to a more tech savvy friend (hi Nick)  

I tried asking people “ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?”  Which was a very famous line from 1989’s Batman.  Then I had a conversation that went like this:



Platypus:   Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?
Loneknight: What?
Platypus:   Nothing. Just something I ask of all my prey.
Loneknight: What?
Platypus:   Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?
Loneknight: What are you talking about?
Platypus:   I’m quoting the Joker from batman.
Loneknight: Oh.
Loneknight: I’m in Greece.
Platypus:   Ah.
Platypus:   In view of the international nature of the internet 
            I guess I need to seek out more universal humor
Loneknight: Yes
Platypus:   Are "your mama" jokes universal?
Loneknight: What?
Platypus:   your mama is so fat she buys her dresses at the 
            tent store
Loneknight: Shut up
Platypus:   So they are universal?
Platypus:   your mama is so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck

From there he didn’t say anything else, but his playing went down hill.  Which I kind of felt bad about.  He wasn’t supposed to get upset he was supposed to talk shit back.  I felt a little bad, but not enough to curb my mouth once I got on a roll.


One thought on “Trolling the chess tables

  1. Pingback: More trolling of chess tables | Shadman The Wonderguy

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